Archive for the ‘Jokes and Quotes’ Category
Sunday, March 16th, 2014
Here are some of the most well read posts on our Facebook page, www.facebook.com/hideawaycove.
In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.
Three grand essentials to
happiness in this life are:
something to do
someone to love and
something to hope for.
#1 Simple Truth Smart People Forget–
Education and intelligence accomplish nothing without action.
Not what we say about our blessings,
but how we use them,
is the true measure of our thanksgiving.
Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least.
Money doesn’t bring you happiness, but it enables you to look for it in more places.
Do not take anything for granted —
not one smile or one person or one rainbow
or one breath, or one night in your cozy bed.
The trouble with going with the flow is, you might wind up getting sucked down the drain.
Age is something that does not matter unless you are a cheese.
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.
Monday, August 12th, 2013
If you follow our Facebook page, we post a quote and picture of a Kauai tropical flower most every day. Here are some of the most popular.
Politicians and diapers have one thing
in common. They should both be changed
regularly, and for the same reason.
Do not let what you cannot do
interfere with what you can do.
When you get older, lack of pep
is often mistaken for patience
Everyone else is taken.
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit;
wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
Never love anybody
who treats you like
Why moms should not text:
Mom, got a A in chem.
WTF, way to go!
Mom, what do you think WTF means?
Well That’s Fantastic!
If you’re feeling blue,
try painting yourself
a different color.
When tempted to fight fire with fire,
remember that the Fire Department
usually uses water.
Monday, July 22nd, 2013
Success is getting what you want.
Happiness is liking what you get.
H. Jackson Brown
A bend in the road is not the end of the road.
Unless you fail to make the turn.
The second day of a diet is
always easier than the 1st day.
By the 2nd day you’re off it.
Do not tell the person that is
carrying you that they stink.
The world is a book and those who
do not travel read only one page.
Mothers of teenagers know why animals eat their young.
Being happy doesn’t mean
everything is perfect.
It means you’ve decided to
see beyond the imperfections.
A good man can make you feel strong, sexy
and able to take on the world…oh sorry…
that’s wine…wine does that.
I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.
You’re on your own.
And you know what you know.
You are the person who’ll decide where to go.
Monday, April 22nd, 2013
I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian.
Thousands of years ago cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.
A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments, soccer games, romances, best friends, location of friend’s houses, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
I was at a wedding recently and the DJ asked, “All the married women please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living.”
The bartender was crushed to death !
Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants. Today it’s open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.
My Grandmother is over eighty and still doesn’t need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
Don’t join dangerous cults! Practice safe sects.
Wednesday, February 23rd, 2011
Should be located in Hawaii, huh?
Friday, February 4th, 2011
To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.
Friday, February 4th, 2011
|Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is bliss, taste it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it.
Thursday, January 13th, 2011
May those who love us love us,
and those who do not love us,
may God turn their hearts,
and if He cannot turn their hearts
may He turn their ankles
that we may know them by their limping.
Tuesday, January 11th, 2011
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
Life isn’t about waiting for storms to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
When you get older, lack of pep is often mistaken for patience.
Saturday, January 1st, 2011
The following ideas about science were obtained from essays, exams and classroom discussions of 5th and 6th graders.
They illustrate Mark Twain’s contention that the “most interesting information comes from children, for they tell all they know and then stop.”
- A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.
- A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants to go.
- In spring, the salmon swim upstream to spoon.
- Marie Curie did her research at the Sore Buns Institute in France.
- One on the main causes of dust is janitors.
- Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot.
- Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun. But I have never been able to make out the numbers.
- The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
- The general direction of the Alps is straight up.
- To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow.
- Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives.
- Wind is like the air, only pushier.
- Humidity is the experience of looking for air and finding water.
- Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillars.
- Mushrooms always grow in damp places so they look like umbrellas.